10 April 2008


Well, my blog got tagged! I just love how people do this on their blogs. It's so fun! It really opens up your thoughts and experiences to your readers on uplifting and fun topics. This time, my friend tagged me to list on my blog ten of my favorite things. Since I'm such a positive person I came up with fifteen:

1. Backpacks on wheels. You see these on campuses everywhere and they are so cool. It makes me feel like I'm walking on a tarmac.

2. People who write checks in the grocery store (or any retail establishment). Especially when they don't start filling anything out until the end of the transaction.

3. Traffic lights that turn red even no one is coming from the other direction. Or the ones that are set on a fixed timer and stay red, even at times of the day when no one is coming from the other direction. Or the ones that have separate left turn arrows that stay red even when no one is coming from the other direction. I get so cheerful in these moments.

4. When the Nintendo cheats. The other night I was playing the Legend of Zelda. I was about to die so I quickly pushed B so Link would drink the medicine, but the stupid witches shot me with their rays even though I know I pushed B first.

5. Driving around parking lots forever to find a spot up close. I've done some simple calculus differentials to determine that it's definitely not faster to park in the first spot you see and walk. It's much better to drive for ages up and down the lanes until you find that perfect spot up close.

6. Bad grammar. Its hard to use that pesky apostrophe correctly.

7. Chest-putters in golf. Whenever a pro misses a putt on TV and he's using a chest-putter, I say in my head, "I'm surprised you missed with that putter. You look totally cool using it."

8. Sportscasters Dickie V and Stephen A. Smith. Their voices are very pleasing to the ear. I also really like Sarah Silverman, the classiest person on TV ever (not counting Rosie O'Donnell, obviously.)

9. Fake words like "ginormous," "preggers," and "anyways."

10. Comic strips way past their prime like Garfield, Peanuts, and Family Circus. Somehow after all these years it's still hilarious when Garfield eats a whole pan of lasagne. And I still think that just this once Lucy isn't going to pull the football out from under Charlie Brown but then she does. Oh Lucy, you're so tricky!

11. The Pontiac Aztek. The reason people sit down and say to themselves, "Well, it's time for a new car. Obviously my best option is the Pontiac Aztek" is because it comes with a tent.

12. NASCAR. Thank you ESPN for making it so accessible. I just love your NASCAR version of Sportscenter called Nascar Now. Car racing is a real sport with real athletes and deserves full coverage by a real sports network like you.

13. Mixing fruit with meat. Those two food groups go perfectly together. Hawaiian pizza is the best example of this. How could you prefer a good ol' cheese and pepperoni pizza over that? Obviously it was invented by people used to cooking a whole pig with an apple in its mouth.

14. Big trucks. They're so polite when they share the road with my little Civic. The only thing better than big trucks is those fake Calvin and Hobbes stickers on big trucks that show Calvin peeing on the logo of the rival big truck manufacturer. Now that's a sign of true class.

15. Musicians who share their political views between songs during their concerts. For my very overpriced concert ticket I get to hear your music AND your opinion on whether or not the U.S. should be in Iraq. Badly Drawn Boy, you know what I'm talking about.


wendy said...

I imagine the though process for Aztek owners goes something like this:
I'd really like to buy a Prius. SO many people are driving them around. Sure, they're ugly, but they're economic and a great way to help reduce my personal dependence on foreign/big oil.
I'm going to get a Prius…or maybe something cheaper.
Yeah! This Aztek LOOKS like the Prius, except with an even more retarded name! (even possible?)
and American made! (these colors don't run)
and it’s got bad gas mileage.!
All of the aesthetic abhorrence with none of the redeeming innards!
I love this country!

Yaj said...

Amazing! Those are my 15 too, except yours are backwards, and kind of inside out. I have a hybrid too. Boy oh boy, I got it to save gas from the SUV's I was driving. They kind of, comewhat lied about the mileage I was going to get. Calculating gas alone, and assuming $3.50/gallon, it will take me 9.5 years to break even. Who's the schmuck now...? But at least I am saving the earth... uh, excuse me, the PLANET. Hey! Isn't Vladimir Ulich Ulianov's birthday coming up?! Good ole' "Nickie" boy! Nothing better than a frisbee on planet day, uh, excuse me, EARTH day!! Yep, that one just might be 16 on my list! Or 1, it doesn't matter which.

Did you like the clever use of that ole' apostrophe? And how the quotes indicated a nickname? Wait, Nickie -- nickname... wow! Am I rambling? Am I starting to look like those old guys waving at Lenin's tomb? Well, NOT!

two forks said...

wait, am i to understand that you were playing zelda last night and not doing a ginormous spring cleaning on our apartment?!

man, i leave you alone for one minute and you break out the frozen pizzas AND you killed link. this is just wonderful.

shortino said...

You know everyone bought the Aztek because they marketed it so well. I mean, you could get a tent that extends out of the hatch. How awesome is that?!!?

At least you got Calvin peeing on a Ford. I really do like big trucks. Big Chevy trucks. And you don't like Nascar either? Are you sure you spent time in Virginia in your childhood? I'm beginning to wonder...