10 September 2010

Why I Love The NFL: An Essay

The NFL season officially started last night and it got me thinking about all the reasons why I love the NFL. Here are just a few:

Player Character
I think it's great that the kids these days have so many role models to whom they can look up. I'd personally be proud if my kids wore a Ben Roethlisberger or Michael Vick jersey to school. And remember, when players are publicly accused of committing an alleged crime, they are innocent until proven guilty. Please don't let the corrupt legal system and biased media taint your views of these otherwise upstanding and inspiring young men. (But maybe you shouldn't have Michael Vick dog sit for you.)

Fantasy Football
I can't think of anything I'd rather do with my spare time than manage a roster of football players from teams I don't like so their stats can compete against my friends' rosters of football players from teams they don't like. And wives love it, too--now their husbands need to watch every game instead of just the one featuring their favorite team. Thank you, Al Gore, for inventing the internet and making all this possible.

Stadium Experience
There really is nothing like the NFL stadium experience--polite, ebriated fans, delicious yet inexpensive concessions, and great views for very reasonable prices. I don't know why anyone would watch a game in HD on their comfy couch at home and it doesn't make any sense to me that half the stadiums don't sell out each week.

I love celebrations so of course I enjoy how players dance, shake, and oscillate to celebrate every routine tackle, catch, and play they make. Really, there should be more celebrating in real life when you accomplish simple tasks that you are expected to accomplish. For example, why shouldn't the mailman have a choreographed dance all ready for each time he puts a letter in your mailbox? NFL players have it right and they're obviously ahead of the rest of us.

Player Loyalty
It's easy to consistently cheer for your team when you see how committed the players are to the fans, the city, and the team. As players repeatedly reject bigger contracts to go elsewhere, you can't help but be reminded that it's not just about money for these guys: they care about giving back to the community. Albert Haynesworth, you know who you are.

Knowing that players who talk like this can still make millions of dollars is a great reminder that everything is right in the world:

I love this game!


two forks said...

this time of year i have four favorite days of the week, sunday, monday, thursday and saturday!

Jay said...

That sounded, like um, a certain somebody when, um, like, um, um, there is no, um, uh, uh, uh, uh, teleprompter.